No dawn for years

this whole patronage of saints
I've followed
tiresome
gruesome
& weary
left nothing for me at
journey's
brickwalled
end

'cept grey as a dirtbag
Sheraton
towel
thrown onto her body
for good
taste
measure

felt like one of those tired
handicapped
heroes
who made so much efforts
unnoticed
who'll pass unnoticed
leave nothing behind
& fade out
& never get paid

the rain's been so long so stripped now:
shed it's skin faintly
to turn out a snake
consumin' its own
stainless steel
tail
while pokin' at men
damn
rusted
below

& so I'm so hopelessly stuck here
at last
w/ other writers chainsmokers
the telephone hooker's
Chinese whispers
& chess
& vodka
& sketchbooks
w/ views at the blank
walls of city
only
them hospitals, markets, morgues & prisons
your daily saccharine
dose

there's no dawn
for years
no faint heart companion
no one or nothing
to freely
hold on to:

it all takes too much sacrifice:
in the end
it's really not worth it