"One Day I Will Visit Italy" (New poem, 2022/01/03)

In my dreams I am in Italy
somewhere on a tiny island
in a small garden
in a private gallery

I listen to new music
admire the paintings
drink Rosa wine
observe the dew
on my guitar strings

in my dreams I am a different person
what shows through in my art
is brute
and incomplete
there are many fragments
that make no sense to me
and so is my life
those tiny fragments
aren't an island
or gallery
or garden

they are asylums
war
death
and terror and noise

I wish I could see the world through my woman's eyes
but she's got religion
where I only have being

existence as an act of rebellion
as some famous writer said
doesn't turn me on anymore

I am sad, in my dreams
where I am a different being
where I have religion through my woman's eyes
and my woman
actually exists

here I only have lovers
changing year after year
month after month
week/week, day/day

I only have tiny fragments
to collect pieces from
but one day I will visit Italy