"Big Beat Hearts" - complete poetry chapbook.

Russian Blocks in the Middle of Nowhere

office pop diggin’ erect
dancing on a comet –
dust tentacles glitter
pale lobotomy & acid, sucker
motor
Fiats
levitating
in the Autumn
sky
village scoff pushin' dawn
you can
shoot
it
w/ your ears wide open
& watch
your skin
turn
a cold war
shade of
amoeba
nuclear glory condo
burnin'
like a redneck
barbecue
quite common now
in these geographical
circumstances
someone sold us
this Western dream
where intelligence
is only part of
an agency's name
not a
human
state
we don't need no
intellectuals
you should all
be in prison
or in
psychiatric wards
Stalin
knew
how to deal
w/ you

industry
builds
like an
octopus
it's an insect
invader
office girls standin' in defect
where someone built
blocks in the
middle of nowhere
if nowhere means
fields of corn
& a few huts
in the middle
of
Russia
or
Arkansas
or
this
place

Bea

with a tepaphone vegetatory call
weakness for French
solar tea
pink sunglasses
various lipstick colors
cut ups, she transmits now – sun
within whose over life fools?
girl way strip minute
snake strike liquid to colliding shapes
 dark how again
 was away, muscles marked theremin
music
from the dark side of the moon
while Bea
by many man more
considered
the bird-like startled blue-catching starlet
sense moon signs of “so I am!”
and, so she was; someone by whom you know narrow
paths to
desire crushing answers
spontaneous, times not these,
just excited but which me?
the one she captured?
 everyone except Charon
on board!
there's a funky idea we have
for your old, flamboyant id
where
acceptance sighs dry
bare and pink when violin debts
over valuable hells
of your childhood
just remember me and the music we made
while everyone thought it was
love – to describe you
is useless.

The Festival

You’re a star child roaming free
You’re the song of life
…
Speak the truth and glow like sun
Get rid of ego’s pride
…
we gathered here to sing and harvest soul, freedom where wings of it exist
in retroidyllic dreams
on love’s white tide over acid skies
naturally garden high
skull highway to the sky
…
from freedom in our skulls, slipping from the stage we’ve built
jumping from Jupiter sky – down…dawn on sunset
in our hair, brilliant spheres, down, to photographic rain
half a million people danced, or more, beautifully stoned
but no one’s really there
or was where
we dared to dare
sift
phonographic sands
with butterfly brains
…
Join us here in pearls of rain –
you’ll never be the same
…
Pity sad souls wasting daybreak
For pain are they to blame
…
in freedom’s dream and love’s white tide we began to sing
of mountains cold’s live days’ galore
where everything was green
cops memorized a million deaths
we survived before
may no fear invade your heart
even when you walk alone
…
younger, bolder, truer than
all the old lies we’ve been told
no need for new revolutions
at the festival
…
no price tags on clear blue sky
sun bonfire or a pyre
find your own Satori there
in it thunderous morning skulls
conspire

Big Beat Heart

some vile movies
poor quality tapes
ripped from the head of the paradox

they fill a jug of Polish flowers
Polish bells
Polish books & records

we improvise like always, on their innocent
magnet, mazed & incoherent beer rave
tired, stoned, but serious
writing poems
about the beefy child skull fabric, fed luncheon meat
& religion
on top of which
all trippy sinners
find peace in a local church, in tranquil boobs of sport, in parks
or I don't care where, but elsewhere
& forget about
art & god
watching football games
Eurovision
birthdays

music fills the backbone silence
w/ acoustic currents of disaster
but nobody's listening to the groove

instead, we sculpt crazy haircuts
repetitive news
& death
in funfair mirrors
distracted by video angels
soaring high in prime time
exhaustiveness, over buttons to push
& ads to skip through
meaningless
slave corporate lives
worth not even half the dirt under your fingernails

someone steals a candle
from debt orchard
a smile
from a policeman
& moves on

a killer
thinking he found me

dressed up in books he walks on unnoticed
through bone pulp
wilderness
broken
heartless frames
stained w/ morning rain
& into my
big beat heart

Sky-Trotter

weed animal breed collect inspect the seed
which should be grain but we're
out of
anything real, organic/with parameters/
so, we feast on red sick weed, oceanic
nuclear tweed
of future tribes injecting this poison
direct
lie, ly, sing syllables of death
while you still have time
to voice them in an unfree void
of picturesque torment atrocity
heed, ascend, but heal, descent
from high orbit safe rooms
and witness whatever
this planet still has
in store galactic markt
for the tiny
sky-trotter
inside us
customer
of Earth Zoo, dying
in piles of clothes
sold burning.

We Don’t Dance

We creep past the U-bahn, bend under lights
Sleep in the cafes, sentimental dives
Keeping what is ours always in plain sight
Virus of our liver, sugar of your eyes
Speed all over shady alleys, slow real tide
Life is not just rhythm, death is not a chance
This is why we’re underground
Writing when you dance – and we, we just
Romance – revolution’s trance – the Dalai Lama
Whorehouse, general’s fireplace

Reading Bild in the shade

antediluvian cities
erect sax
in the jungle
beyond the narrative
there are no confessions

deadly alive
the realistic rover smiles

sulky soma of awakening

every soul radiant

flames of your burden on a train
struggling notes
struggling to play in tune
sounds blessed on plain joints
coffee in the bass crater
where you should
only
make noise
noise
more noise

what have you done to my daytime?
reading Bild
in the shade
survivatory
sullen
throat space

singing:
we're reading
Bild in the shade

controls shine softly
where sun once stood
where we had no difficulties
with language
towering sea experiments
& ambrosia women

now we just listen
to Prince
& fuck 'til life
& everything
we touched
is
forgotten

Narcocorridos

Iza finds German noise tapes for me
recently
from Mexico
came a bonus of drug lord chansons
she took back home
from the latest trip
sung heroically they describe
the taste in my mouth
when I write poems
it's nothing close to death
or drugs or earth
but heavens localized tripodically
among my eyes, and in front
of the third one
that I gaze out in to search for
narcocorridos' plot
it's similarly fragrant
and vagrantly familiar
brings back echoes
I could draw on Greek monuments
instruments
from back in time
when she found the first German
noise tape for me
and it'll take me 30 good years
to listen to everything
she brings to my attention
but
oh, it's the cops outside
must be looking for me
they always do when the winter comes
I've got to sleep roomless
in case of another
frost bite
clotheless
in case they want to
talk me warmly
in.

Raja’s Blues

You know Raja’s got the backbone, got the frontbone too
He got blood of alligators and a case of hoochie-coo
And he’s pale like morning sunlight, faster that any known light
Sounds good without any amps, fake reasons to survive
White volume and electric keyboards will never crowd his floor
Smaller than an ant, much greater than the world

Raja’s got one morning ahead of you and yours
All you’s got are curtains, he controls the doors
Domino demons in action, carpenters of fact
Seldom shares of kindness say that Raja’s love’s a mess

Change food for corny daggers, originals can’t confess
Consciousness of guilty paralyzed with death
Fear sleeps in your rearview mirror, where Raja takes a rest
Bathed in bubbled certainties, fortunes of your wooden vests

Raja’s got ladies by a million talking and walking the blues
He learned it before you painted him white, or repaid his sacred dues
You can pay for Raja’s thoughts later, after he’s done with atomic clouds
And former space age clowns

This Place is Full of Crosses

wait, babe
I never carried crosses
unless ’twas the Southern Cross
light & light years ago
sowing humanity on
distant planets
ghastly big stepping stone years
of death-rebirth
mistakes
&
accidents
messiahs
&
madmen
Jesus was a schizophrenic
that's
all
today he'd be simply
diagnosed
& kept safe
in a room

but this place
is full of crosses
and endless crucifixions
Nova
style

supernova

they like their things big
bigger boys
need
bigger toys
& clone-children
& evolution
& macho
meat

this place is full of crosses
you wanna stay here?
make pretty pictures?
talk religion
& crap?
go on
but
without
me

I'm a schizophrenic too, like
Jesus
so, I must be
on my
way

greetings
from a
room

Shapes of Love (To Come)

while you're waiting
we define the process
becoming the becomer
welcoming the welcomer
in shapes of love, to come, visit
leech deal
happens daily with fresh clean
hands; lynch happens on Sundays
sheltered in church bells
I hate hearing then
but hey, in the shapes of love
there's no place for them
luckily, no other music, but
tropical bird songs, is allowed
in my apartment now
I inhale the fresh winter cream
air as soft as coffee
Bea is loving to make love
to come, for us
in those shapes no deal is scary
and I sign everything, trembling
just for love, for money, for
rent, for sale, as always, in corridor
of black stars mirroring white holes
universes' energy merging
collapsing
eventually
forgetting all was us.

Dancing with the Early Stars (Me, You, Ah Pook)

I can’t stop, I’m never waiting, never wondering how or why
Living like a firecracker, dancing with the early stars
If I had another promise, if we had another land
Hopeless, cruel and wasted angels climbing up the human grave
Wings of panic, sounds of shelter – undemanding desert calls
Hear her wisdom, hear the ages – to the highway’s end you go
I can’t stop you, I can’t teach you, I can’t be your midnight guide
Cannot take you to the night’s den – hungry lions suck in your sight
Desire is vision is god, the theater, the actor, the eye
Stage dust settles down, performance is passion is blood
Me, you, Ah Pook

Gemini

I eat pickle
drink sour old beer for 2 zloty
in a Jeżyce gate
where dawn is burning pink &
every cloud is perfect
she says
„I'm fresh
& clean
so trouble me
some more”

but I
don't give a fuck, take my
beautiful Fender out of
its case, finish my beer
& play cantatas
for sky

my Georgian friend says
flip your life record
to B-side
but there's same old blues
on both
sides
so why
bother
when I can listen
to „Summer Wine”
and dream of
Natalia
ad nausea

backstage
I'm even more stoned
than on records
& crazier
than her clarinet razor

we murder Bach
talk birds
I get me another beer
someone's laughing
in the backyard

it's a nice bar
I must've left all my
troubles at home
but they'll come back
eventually
and she'll say
„I'm Gemini”
in the morning
pissing me off
even more

cause that will be the truth

Pink Planet in the Sky

game one
soft words
a single wolf cry, same cat walking
daybreak street
a distant drum pump
sweet scent rhythm pool
in forest
a child on a swing, in death park, coughing
while I smoke
winter/summer together less
walking desert illumni
rearranging structures of breath
speaking sparkling the rhythm
painting spray sky over
with mute approach
to languages leaving
packages burning
passengers lifting
airplane toxicology
from under pink planet in the sky
I watch plane's wing
until sky is the only
word
with
morning freedom
in shy sky sun
ascending over
Earth
while I am
not watching.

Ghost Bus

Take the tenement trail they’re already razing down
And the streetcars that once rode there disappeared without a sound
But one bus stop still exists, it’s a night line no one takes
Through the districts now forgotten where no neon dares to flare

You can say it’s just a ruin but there’s people all around
And the children they once raised there lost the war in ’45
Now just one bus line remembers all the ups and downs of town
It’s a shame that no one rides it when the districts’ birthdays come

So the ghost bus it could take you where no human dares to walk
And the driver he could show you how the nighttime’s engine works
While the ghost town that you witness was once crowded with young life
Lovers ran through bright lit bridges now collapsed and lost in time

Now there’s only ugly buildings filled with echoes circling round
Now there’s only ugly buildings filled with echoes circling round

Ghost of Dawn in My Empty Arms

we picked cherries
drawn pigtailed faces
hid the marker eraser
bid tour nights to the farewell of mythology
birth of reality
sometime on a bench somewhere in a tight frame
she danced, the ghost of dawn in my empty arms
again, I shook off that feeling
and exited, shy, the scenery setting
let go
we picked pages randomly
puzzling flowers
from South African soil
made collages, lost documents, not
documented
forgotten to document the obvious
choose choice matter voice over matter
over choose you lose that fuse
we picked
from out of an anarchist's textbook
in Germany, a long time
ago
I still have notes on first discovery
of poetical vision
but she keeps them floating
as songs, freely
and I like it – structure
gongs of nurture and aprons of sky
that I mention now often
sky, it's three letters to god
from a tainted dog recapsulating
the dinner space chewed breakfast
at midnight.

Omniverse

Visiting unknown forgotten cities
meeting unknown forgotten people there
doing unknown forgotten things
I spend time there in dream zone
the omniverse, the blaze I
shooting clouds from watchtowers
fragmenting souls and bodies
drifting hearts and brains
the scientist of sound and word
what's left for me
when I return to you – eyes like
a cup of coffee
ritual music playing
I turn it off
and gaze at the thrilling sky
another dream to exit
another exit to dream about
I spend time there in your arms
the ominverse, the proud flesh
cooking souls in dessert mode
for the lords of stratosphere
now they are landing
can you hear the ships?
I swear I can
see the engines.

Only in Your Mind

Strange as it seems, I’m only what you think I am
Weird as it is, I’m standing where the sun god stands
And if I had his might there’d be no nights upon our heads
But bright immortal stars
Would fill the depths of Milky Way
Shade exists
Only in your mind
Light exists
Only in your mind
Death exists
Only in your mind
Life exists
Only in your mind

Before I was an Angel

I remember jungles in the morn mist
giant stars on exodus
angels, butterflies in armor
shooting red squares
of patience, wait…
beaten to death by police
somehow I passed through
saw black&white scenes
in the courtroom – judges yelling
this&that, policemen&doctors marching in line
bringing the zone to life
giving out straitjackets of fog
glasses of official vision
inhabitants seem happy, deafened w/ triangular
alien leeches in food & beverages,
consumed daily w/ pride, saluting
the homeland, pierced on spikes
of amusement, drowned in puke of entertainment
fooled by the steel-colored sky, who controls the
opiate controls the future
what was it anyway? birth on this planet
is punishment, man, such punishment is satori:
when you’ve seen the absolute reality
trivial monsters of power won’t rule you
they’re nothing, cowards of shade
toying the id their doctors prescribed me
images? I’ve got’em, lots enough to punish
the punishing cogs, small rat-faced
Goebbels-shaped pricks of inertia
late for the 3rd world war
plotting revolutions in introverted windowless
cabinets, crawling on
words? lots enough to disarm the police states
of the world, with one spit of poison
per 20 million dead pigs
drugs? I am the walking drug – causing death
in the 3rd world druglands
to see children reborn in civilized countries
I should’ve seen the masters, masters of
control, but all I’ve seen were madmen switching
roles with leaders, leaders chained to liberty’s
ankle, raising from the carpet some scumbag dirthole
shat on, happy in a locale
of absence – what was it anyway? do I wanna see this
world, after I was an angel? do I wanna see this, before
I was an angel? it’s a madhouse! deathcamp! funfair!
escape! escape! you will be angels too
but not if you won’t notice